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Weird Websites - Weird News Stories.
MAN FIGHTS GLOBAL WARMING WITH ICE CUBES

Mark Miller of Jay, Maine had his family and neighbors wondering what on earth he was doing as he piled mounds and mounds of ice cubes in his backyard. Upon being questioned, Mr. Miller explained that something had to be done about global warming and this was the way which he had chosen to combat the problem. “If everyone in the world were to pick up on this challenge and were to follow my example we would have this problem eliminated in no time flat,” he predicted. “I am only one, but if I am one. I can’t do much, but I can do something. I say NIMBY, that is NIMBY to global warming and any form of pollution. NIMBY, Not In My Back Yard,” he continued.

 

                            Mr Miller and a neighbour try out the new back yard swimming pool


 

“My husband really does seem to be quite preoccupied with the problem of global warming,” confirmed Janet Miller, when questioned about her husband’s apparent obsession. “But I for one consider this a good thing. Ever since his retirement my husband has been following me around like a puppy, trying to help me with my daily work. I managed to sneak out of the house the other day in order to preserve my sanity and quite possibly my husband’s life. When I came home, I found that he had totally rearranged my kitchen in order to make it more labor efficient and cut down on my work load. We ate out that night and shall continue to do so until I manage to restore the kitchen to something resembling its usual inefficient order so that I can manage to find my cooking utensils. All in all, I’m pleased with this obsession. I can put up with the bother of having him traipsing in and out of my kitchen on his ice cube runs if it keeps him out of my hair otherwise. He is even talking about buying a new refrigerator, especially for its ice cube making skills,” she added. “I can put up with that as long as I have the rest of the refrigerator for my own use.” She grinned.

 

           The ice cubes after subjected to 2 hours of Global Warming


Mark Miller has proved himself to be very popular with local yard sale entrepreneurs. “He’ll buy all our old ice cube trays,” confirmed Edward Shultz, one of the Miller’s nearby neighbors. “And he’ll pay exorbitant prices to get them. I’ve made several trips to local thrift stores to buy all of their ice cube trays, knowing that Mark will buy them at at least one hundred times what I pay for them. During these times of such high gas rates, I really needed to find a way to be able to afford gas and for me, Mark has proven himself to be a virtual gold mine.”
Mark Miller divides his days between three different occupations, printing and handing out brochures concerning global warming, keeping his own ice cube stacks maintained and recruiting people for what he calls the Ice Cube Brigade. “It’s time we start to work together,” he shouted, during a speech given at the local town hall. “We need to unite against this common enemy. We, the ordinary people, the common man, the so called squares of this society. We need to start thinking cubed.”
 

 

Story by our news reporter Gail McLeod - Working for Independence

 

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